The holidays don’t exactly look like what I envisioned them to look like when I was a young girl….but that’s okay, right? Right?
Perhaps the holidays mean new traditions. Traditions that I begin, that will forever hold a special place in my son’s heart.
Oxford’s definition of “holiday” is: a day of festivity or recreation when no work is done. Wow. Let me wrap my mind around that for a bit. You do the same.
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Haven’t WE created the work around holidays? Yes, we have jobs, but outside of that, how much of our holidays are centered around trying so hard to make sure everyone else is happy that we often neglect the things that make us the most happy because we’re so busy running in circles trying to check things off lists, attend parties just for the sake of getting to wear that ugly Christmas sweater that we bought years ago for a party that we never got to attend because our kid puked on us, which turned into an evening of tossing in the towel and eating Fruit Loops for dinner? I digress. The FACT is, we can’t make everyone happy, no matter how hard we try. And that’s a-ok.
I’ve recently had a few things thrown in my life recently that have really frustrated me, to the point of tears a few times Don’t worry…I hid the tears because that’s what us warriors do, right? {Eye roll} There are times, especially during this time of the year, that I feel like a failure in every way. My family is part of a divorce statistic. I guess we probably have a number in the autism rate statistic? I’ve shared a role in the unemployment statistic this year. The list goes on, so yeah, there are days when I struggle to hold my head high. But you know what? My son still looks at me the same way he always has. His eyes, the very windows to his soul, tell me all I need to know. He loves me unconditionally, and I love him unconditionally. We have each other, we have our faith, a roof over our head, food on the table, clothes on our back, and an amazing family & friends. That’s enough for me.
Even though there are days of struggle, I’m trying to be really honest with myself. True to my family. If that means that our traditions look a bit differently, well, I’m fine with that.
And I’ll remind myself to read this again next year.